Transforming Conflict Into Collaboration

Overview

Two members with opposing viewpoints and different technical focuses met in our Discord community and immediately clashed. Through individual conversations and facilitated collaboration on their respective projects (a chess variant and a gamified habit tracker), they went from conflict to becoming collaborative peers over the course of a year.

The Challenge

Two developers joined the Discord community coaching group with different skill sets and opposite worldviews. Whenever certain topics came up in group sessions, they would clash intensely. Both were ready to quit because they couldn't stand each other.

The Approach

• 1

  Spoke to each individually about the conflict and their goals for being in the community

• 2

  Facilitated collaboration on their personal projects: a chess variant and a gamified habit tracker

• 3

  Highlighted how their complementary skills (one's logic/backend focus, the other's design/UX strengths) could benefit each other

• 4

  Created opportunities for them to help each other without forcing divisive discussions

• 5

  Modeled respectful disagreement and focus on shared values (craftsmanship, growth, creativity)

• 6

  Allowed relationship to develop naturally through working on meaningful projects together

The Results

• The backend-focused developer received valuable design feedback that elevated their chess variant UI

• The design-focused developer got backend architecture guidance that made their habit tracker more robust

• They began to see each other as whole people rather than opposing viewpoints

• Started collaborating voluntarily outside of formal group sessions

• Developed mutual respect and learned to work together productively despite differences

• Both projects reached completion with better quality thanks to their collaboration